Free Running

Red, White and Green

2008-05-13T12:59:00.017Z

Next week I am a panellist at the Harpers/Wine Intelligence Green Debate at the London Wine Fair. There's grandiose posh for you. I can only hope that I was asked to participate because I have no idea what a Green Wine is supposed to be?

I googled GreenWine and fell into a site called 'The Green Wine Competition'. As expected this promises to solve such dilemmas as '"which organic wines do I want to buy?" The Hon Chairman is my old pal from Fetzer days Paul Dolan. Salad days indeed.

It's a laudable project but one can't help wondering whether the whole Green Thing has gone a long way beyond whether a bunch of grapes has been biodynamically produced or whether a wine has been organically certified or not?

'Green' cannot be a tag defined by the vineyard or winery alone. It needs to be assigned to the complete commercial life cycle of the finished product. If that means checking whether the truck driver smoked three hundred cigarettes on his way up from Italy then so be it. Green is about how clean the planet will be AFTER the wine has been produced and drunk.

Green therefore is a very big word. Prizes are not relevant in the green debate. This is about not losing and has nothing to do with short term winners.

Most Irish consumers pay scant attention to Fairtrade, organic and biodynamic wines. Most stores seem to make an issue of stocking at least token supplies from each sector. One store owner told me that he 'wouldn't want to let the side down' and that he wanted to be 'seen doing the right thing'. Sort of missing the point really. Cosmetics won't matter much when the planet dies..

So, I presented a product I came across in Italy to a range of consumer types and also to a range of wine trade retailers. I asked them all a very simple question, 'What do you think?'.

The answer was the same from everyone. 'Won't buy' and 'won't sell'. This was on sight alone!!

The product was a 200ml can of a 7.5abv frizzante red wine out of Piedmont labelled VinoandFashion.

The following is a list of some of the objections:

Can

7.5% is too low

frizzante red
Wasn't clear from the front of the can what it actually was.

I pointed out to each of my cohort that this was all very negative and couldn't they at least try the damn thing. Fair enough was the reply, if you'll pay for a tasting and sampling program to go with the launch of the product.

I mentioned that the product was 'Very Green. 'Look at the can and the weight and how easy it is to cool and and and ....' They all looked at me as if I was ranting. Cheek of them. I wasn't even preaching!

Wine first. Price and familiarity will determine its appeal. Save the planet second. Some causes resonate: others don't. How resonant is Green? Well, my can could tingle and tinkle all it liked. It wasn't going to resonate no matter what shade of Green it was.

It's going to take a while to save the planet I thought until I realised that we could bypass the consumer altogether. If all products were Green then Stockists wouldn't need to make a choice and the consumer would just get on with the dirty job of enjoyment.

As I say. it's going to take a while to Save the Planet.

A snip at half the price or is it just a snip?

2008-04-01T13:55:00.010Z

I was reading the Irish Times Magazine last weekend. It's a good mag. I read it every weekend. It has a new wine correspondent - stolen from The Sunday Tribune...or came across..whatever, he's new and this blog really has nothing to do with his column.

A Snippet

No. This blog has to do with two separate comments in the mag in relation to wine value.

The aforementioned columnist, John Wilson, reported on a promotion by the fabulous Ely Wine Bar. He reckons a Viognier from Domaine du Montmeillet is 'a snip at €32.00 per bottle..'

Later in the same issue everyone favourite food critic, Tom Doorley, reckons that Dr Von Basserman's Mosel Riesling is ' a snip' at €24.45 on the Liberty Grill's menu.

Home Made Snippets!

So, we have a SNIP at 32.00 and another at 24.45. Fun isn't it? Pat the Patricia Carroll in the same issue reckons Domaine Begude Le Petit Ange VdP d'Oc is 'a steal' at €7.49 in the Superquinn wine sale.

Is a snip and steal the same thing and are either good value? Is it possible to find good value in Ireland at all? What does a snip mean anyhow? Is it good value or is it simply better value compared to another time or place?

Maybe its just a good sound bite and doesn't mean anything at all?

Good value in the Irish wine market must relate to the quality of the wine and its price in relation to wines of a similar quality being sold elsewhere in the market. We have been fooled, in a very spectacular fashion, by the super markets into believing that value is price related only.

Supermarkets will sell anything these days..

Half Price is not the same as good value. Should it have been the full price in the first place? What makes up the full price so that it can be sold at half price and yet return a full margin to the super market? Does the distributor or producer get more when it's being sold at Full Price. I doubt it very much!

Is it a SNIP when we are asked to pay twice the average spend on a bottle of wine or should that be termed good value? I can make the case where Chateau d'Yquem is good value at a very high price. I can equally agree with Pat Carroll that €7.49 is good value for the VdP in question. Is it a steal however when it could be sold cheaper still or that someone else is selling something just as good at a lower price!

I reckon that

It's a SNIP when:
You are offered a discount off the shelf price.

It's a STEAL when:
It can never be found cheaper.

It's a BARGAIN when:
It's cheaper than last week.

It's GOOD VALUE when:
It's unique and seems to be offered at the lower end of the available price bracket rather than the at the highest price the market can hold.

It's a GOOD VALUE BARGAIN SNIP STEAL when:
It's been smuggled!

Reserved, Revered or just Downright Confused

2008-02-08T15:42:00.005Z

Tesco has a wine from South America on its shelves right now. It's not just any old wine. It's a 'Reserve' wine. Well, it's not just any old Reserva either! It's a 'Special Reserve' or an 'Especial Reserva' to be precise.

Lucky Tesco and lucky us. Very lucky. It will only set us back €6.99.

This story just keeps getting bigger and bigger - but no-one seems to notice!

How do they do it? Those Tesco boys. Don't they just Give us a Little Every Day and as we all know Every Little Helps. They really must know their stuff. Those Tesco Boys.

They certainly know how to fool us and they know how to make wine labels that stick to more than just the bottle.

Reserva is a wine term that in many instances means nothing whatsoever. At €6.99 this is clearly one of those instances. If Reserva means nothing, as in this case, then what the hell does Especial Reserva mean?

What can we expect next? House Special Especial Reserva.

Even the great Torres can't resist the term

A Reserve wine means something to me. It says that it 's a step up and a step away from the basic wine in the range. It has been reserved or chosen by the wine maker as a wine that we can judge him or her by. It's a wine that shows the region off to its best; it's a wine that shows the potential of the ageing process and how the grapes in question have responded. Above all it's a wine that its worth paying a bit extra for.

In the case of the Tesco wine - it's worth pointing out here that 'the Tesco' wine is simply a good example of this type of wine label and Firstpress is not impugning Tesco in any shape or form as being a culprit; this is a widespread practice throughout the wine trade - neither the word Reserva nor the word Especial mean anything whatsoever!

The world that is wine is a peculiar place. No other foodstuff would be allowed to get away with the degree of obfuscation that exists with wine labels.

To begin with there is no ingredient labelling. (Randal Gram at Bonny Doon has begun the process of voluntary disclosure.) There are very differing wine laws in existence throughout the world. If one guy is allowed to put something into the wine and another is not we should be made aware of the ingredient that has been added before we put it into our mouth!

There should be mandatory explanations of terms such as Classico and Superiore and Reserva when they have been put onto the label. If they mean something then be proud of it.

Retailers should be questioned. What does that mean? Why is it on the label? What do you mean it means nothing? Give them a hard time and they'll soon bring their grumbles up the supply chain. Yank their cord and they'll flush it.

This is a well fashioned web of deceipt that has gone on for so long now that the trade cannot see the problem.

Just think of the new toilet duck was a 'Reserva'. We'd all roll around laughing and then ask the supplier for an explanation.

Put Reserva on to a jam and we'd expect a difference of some sort over the non reserva.

Put it on to a wine and all we say is that we are getting very good value at €6.99 for a Reserva. Who's fooling who here?

A Bordeaux Reserve - Grand Vins or Wha!

Ryanair Giving Booze Away For Free?!

2008-02-05T19:27:00.000Z

It's true. Ryanair has a BOGOFF on booze.

Buy One Get One Free promotions are frowned on big time in the Irish drinks trade.

Firstly they are not supposed to make money.

Ryanair? I don't think so.

Secondly, they promote irresponsible behaviour.

Ryanair? Ah, that's more like it!

Strange how noone notices the effects of a high alt Booze Bogoff

Firstpress made an official complaint to MEAS (Mature Enjoyment of Alcohol in Society) about how Ryanair would like to get us all boozed up. A promotion of this sort is in breach of MEAS guidelines. Most major players in the Irish drinks trade have signed up to these.

So, if you have a small night club in the back of beyonds and you decide to give a shot away with every entry ticket redeemed you will be pilloried both through the trade and then in the Press.

'Never Mind Up, I can't find Down....'

If you have a small one stop store in Ballybunion and decide to have a good old BOGOFF for the weekend. Think again. The resulting publicity might put you out of the bog for good and into some deep shite instead.

But Ryanair will fly on regardless. They don't come under the MEAS Code of Practice it seems. They told MEAS to get lost as they operate in international airspace! They claim that they don't sell alcohol in Ireland at all. Next time the drinks trolley comes around have a look out the window. If you can still see Wexford don't touch the stuff or you might find yourself taking part in the same conspiracy.

Ryanair does not only sell alcohol in international airspace. Give me a BOGOFF.

Firstpress was undaunted. He went on to the Advertising Standards Authority of Ireland. What a guy.

Strike Two.

It seems that even though dozens of Ryanair aircraft are parked in Ireland with adverts throughout them encouraging us all to BOGOFF on alcohol there is nothing the ASAI can do! Put the same thing onto a billboard at the side of the M50 and see what happens! Better still target St Stephens Green or anywhere near the Dept of Justice etc.
Amazing.

Brian Lenihan our intelligent Minister in charge of Justice and all things legal and illegal has decided for a number of reasons to investigate the misuse of alcohol in Irish society.

Strangely but an historical context wasn't part of the Government Alcohol Advisory Group that the Minister set up. Nor was Ryanair. I suppose the latter could be excused. You can't expect O'Leary's gang to stop trying to make a buck. Even if an alcohol fuelled BOGOFF is advertised beside the soft drinks in their inflight magazine.

MEAS published its second annual report recently. It was subtitled Encouraging Responsible Marketing. The Chairman, Dr Gordon Holmes mentions in his report that 'the pricing of alcohol presents its own problems. Many of the supermarkets and off licenses have surprisingly low prices.' Firstpress has been told by MEAS that the same Chairman is not allowed to note the same thing about airlines. WHY NOT?

In her foreward the Chief Executive of MEAS, Fionnuala Sheehan, for whom Firstpress has lot of time, says' the notable deficiency to date has been the absence of a holistic view and a sufficiently joined up approach to alcohol policy development and its implementation.' Well that's certainly true when Ryanair can do what it likes and how it likes on board its own aircraft.

I wonder what the reaction would if the adverts on the aircraft encouraged something like, 'Good Old Neo Nazism' or suggested 'Free Porn for All' or God Forbid supported one political party over another!! How about 'A bottle of Whiskey with every copy of Hustler' delivered to your mailbox. I expect both MEAS and the ASAI would find a voice and cause to raise concern. I expect everyone would!

Please keep the pole way clear during Takeoff...

The history of ambivalence continues. It seems that the same Gordon Holmes is chairing the Independent Government Alcohol Advisory Group as Chairs the MEAS Independent Complaints Commitee. In both cases he has been told who to look at and to look only in the present tense.

The past it seems has no responsibility. Just like Ryanair.

Two can do when toucan one at a time

Get a grip Harpers. Headlines are images too!

2007-12-04T10:00:00.000Z

I was walking down the street in London Wednesday just gone when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of pounds for some food. I got out my purse and took a ten pound note out and asked, 'If I give you this money, will you buy wine with it instead of food?' 'No, I had to stop drinking years ago', the homeless woman told me.

'Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?' I asked. 'No, I don't waste time shopping,' the homeless woman said. 'I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.'

'Will you spend this in a beauty salon instead of food?' I asked. 'Are you NUTS !' replied the homeless woman. ' I haven't had my hair done in 20 years!'

'Well,' I said, 'I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you out for dinner with my husband and me tonight.' The homeless woman was shocked. 'Won't your husband be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting.' I said, 'That's okay. It's important for him to see what a woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments, and wine.'

Good story. Funny and to the point.

Take another which appeared in Harpers last week. The headline ran 'Priests are Drink Drive Risk'. Fair enough. Has someone uncovered stats relating to Priests' driving habits (sic)?; the state of their cars? drinking on the job?. Well, I should go further and quote the opening line. It went as follows, 'Priests in Ireland have voiced their concern at a proposed cut in the drink driving limit.' It goes on to have a belly laugh at the expense of priests, the Eucharist and drink driving laws.....not anywhere mind but specifically in Ireland. Harpers quotes Reuters.

The Reuters column was based on a piece on RTE where Fr Brian d'Arcy agreed that due to the lack of priests in rural Ireland it was common for a priest to say a few masses and drive to each of them every Sunday morning. He equally agreed that 'you could be over the limit'.

Currently Harpers is running a series of articles that come under the title, 'The Alcohol Debate'. This is dead serious and asks questions of the drinks industry as well as other interested parties. How can we stop irresponsible drinking behaviour?

Well maybe it would help if Harpers began by choosing how it 'bounces' stories along from the likes of Reuters! Harpers finished off with the line , 'Anything you'd like to confess Father?'

There is no drink driving culture among priests in Ireland. They are breathalysed as often as anyone else on the roads. No priest is claiming that it should be otherwise; indeed insurance companies would notice if 'priests in Ireland' as a category were causing accidents.

RTE and Reuters are news agencies and are not members of the drinks trade. Harpers is a member of both. As such it cannot afford to use news in a loose manner. If it does it becomes part of the problem where the alcohol debate does not include the drinks trade media.

'Priests are Drink Drive Risk' would not be allowed as a road side advert. It is simply not true. Yet Harpers is comfortable to use it as a banner headline.

The story I opened with is funny. It's a joke. Would it be so funny in a Salvation Army magazine or a Simon Community bulletin?

Miguel Torres

2007-11-09T12:17:00.000Z

I am one of the lucky ones. Every now and then I am invited to meet Miguel Torres. OK ,I tried to get a one on one interview this time around. I failed miserably. Gatekeepers!

I mention 'luck' in the context of a trade (wine!)dominated by big personalities, egos and pr companies.

I am also aware of my timing in terms of simply being alive and available at the right time.

I am one of the lucky ones because I am in the trade when someone like Miguel Torres is alive. He is a man who is a lot more than a famous wine maker with a mission. (There's lots of them around.) No, he is a soft and inviting personality who has maintained his ability, through inumerous successes, to have a youthful appreciation for wonder. He spreads this 'wine wonder' through an unfailingly energetic spirit of sharing.

A number of years ago I was a participant on the Miguel Torres Wine Course. A few years prior to that I had visited the Torres facility at Villafranca and over the past six years have returned there twice and attended three lectures/dinners with Miguel Torres here in Dublin. Short of attempting to persuade you that I travel well and travel often I mention all of these because at every single event Miguel Torres presented himself and presented himself well. That's a rare gift for someone who is Chief Executive of one of the biggest and most succesful wineries in the world. (Take note bureaucrats; humanity may not be a cost related item but when it adds to the perceived value of a brand it's a loser who doesn't encourage it.)

He's not a saint. No-one is recommending canonisation. Clearly he works his team very hard. That's business. He really does take note when his agents screw up while he's around. He looks to the bottom line as much as anyone else. He does get tired and let's face it he sometimes gets his lines mixed up and then wanders off message. But I remember....

One time I left VinExpo in Bordeaux and with about two hundred thousand other lost souls began a hot walk back to a hotel to try and get a taxi. Miguel and his sister Marimar were walking in the same direction. I tucked in between the two of them and for the next ten minutes we chatted like three schoolchildren, swinging our shoolbags on the way home, on a warm summers evening. Short of holding hands it epitomised the true spirit of 'wine family'.

Last week local agents Woodford Bourne hosted a Dinner with Miguel Torres at South in the Beacon Centre, Dublin. Besides introducing:

Vina Sol 07

Nerola White 06

Marimar Don Miguel Vineyard Acero Chardonnay 05 outstanding

Fransola 06

Santa Digna Gewurztraminer 07

Jean Leon Merlot 04 a fave of mine

Nerola Syrah 05

Celeste 04

Salmos 05 brilliant

Cordillera 04

Mas la Plana 03

Moscatel Oro

Torres 10 Brandy

and El Silencio Arbiquena Extra Virgin Olive Oil

Miguel had time to talk about his family and tell a few jokes. I like the one where he was impressed that his hotel in Chile stocked his Torres 10 year old brandy. At least it showed well behind the bar when he arrived. Next day he couldn't see it on the spirits trolley. 'Why not', he asks a passing waiter who replies with honesty and sincerity, 'We only stock that when Mr. Torres is visiting!'

Recently Jonathan Nossiter followed up Mondevino with Gout et Pouvoir. His tenet that the wine world has succumbed to banality is well expressed. Perhaps he should now focus his talent towards the positive and to those wine makers who have continued to express individuality as a virtue.

I propose Salmos 2005 by Torres out of Priorat as a contender for a brilliant wine ploughing its own furrow where many have not. I propose this wine because even though Torres quotes Parker as proclaiming Priorat as the best region for red wine production in Spain and even though Torres respects the might and skill of Parker and the quality of the US market and its consumers he still made a wine that reflects the region rather than a style for the Parker Palate.

Ah, the brush stroke of genius at work....silent and soft...it swishes with delicate motion...the wonder will always be not where it is intended to go to but where we are prepared to follow.....

Dibdin, Barbaresco and good wine writing

2007-10-15T11:39:00.000Z

A couple of months ago I read an Obituary in the Irish Times for Michael Dibdin. It was a completely brilliant read. It sold me on an author I had never read. Indeed a recently, and now permanently, dead one at that. Sad? I don't know. Dibdin's writings don't die.

Micheal Didbin 1947 -2007

Subsequent to the obit. I bought a couple of Dibdin paperback's in a second hand bookstore on Charing Cross Road, London. I was over for a tasting - miles away, but I can never resist a warm afternoon on Charing Cross ....

As it happened one of the books I purchased is titled 'A Long Finish'. It relates an Aurelio Zen murder mystery set in vineyards around Asti in Piedmont. It's a romp and good one at that. The wine detail is entirely accurate and modern. Mind you he does give an acknowledgment to Jancis Robinson for getting the wine end of things tidy.

This set me thinking about good writing. Here's a well researched novel where plot and characters are set into a technical wine world. Dibdin chose which bits of the wine world were relevant to his novel. He then decided how to use all of the available detail. It's a great skill and Dibdin certainly displays it well in 'A Long Finish'.

What then is 'good wine writing'? Is it a collection of facts; is it about those guys who have somehow managed to taste all of the best wines in the world; is it about opinion; does a good writer need to be a good reviewer/taster; is it about being published; is it about a story and how it's presented? Is it fact or fiction? I suppose it's all of these and more.

Good wine writing for me is something that's readable and relevant. A bit like Kris Kristofferson's quote ' if it sounds country it is country'. If it sounds like wine writing it is wine writing but is it readable and more to the point is it worth reading? Let's face it a lot of country is simply just - a lot of country.

I don't read Robert Parker's Wine Advocate. Correct me if I'm wrong but I reckon it's a bit of a surprise to Parker that so many try to! Equally I don't read the telephone book. They're reference books. Don't read them.

I like originality and well phrased sentences. I abhor inaccuracies. I love a story. I have no time for recycled press releases being fobbed off as wine writing; reviewing, or God forbid, opinion.

I'm normal.

Why, oh why, then is so much published about so little? No one seems capable of writing an ordinary wine story any longer. Writers seem to have to search out the obscure and fanciful. Maybe that's why Andrew Jefford is so well received? He talks about the ordinary man in the field. He tells a story.

Reviewers seems to think that its somehow relevant to publish tasting impressions of wines that less than 00000.1% of the wine drinking population is ever going to drink or even be bothered with! Those reviews should be put into the Advocate. That's what it's there for.

I'm calming down. I'm in a small country and to a large extent we don't have any wine writers. We do have some brilliant writers. Good on you Anne Enright....... We have brilliant story tellers and fantastic stories. I often wonder why these luminaries aren't encouraged to write our wine columns for us. Because they're not technically proficient; couldn't be bothered; want to do their 'thing'; don't want to be seen as 'colour' writers; because there are good enough wine writers out there already? All of these and more.

Come on guys make yourselves relevant to more than a few officianados. Cross over into mainstream and make wine writing as much an art form as the product you're writing about. Bring it alive; make it sexy; burn the midnight oil; forget convention; get excited every now and then; develop new 'stereotypes'!

Begin by asking a few questions : you might develop a few answers.

Limerick to Stormhoek

2007-10-04T13:45:00.000Z

I sent a couple of Limerick's in to a 'Harpers Weekly' competition recently. They went like this:

Whiskey should always have an E,
It’s so very easy to see.
It shows a 3 times distill,
Satisfaction to the fill;
Irish before Scotch for me!

More to the heart and quite a bit more truthful was the second one….

God; should I believe in Stelvin or Corks?
Tradition or the study of Quorks?
(think i’ll just drink the wine
if it smells and tastes fine)
Read the experts; I’m OK; they say it’s fine.

The whiskey one reminded me of how Ireland is removed from the most important bit of the wine trade. Namely grape growing. It's a shame. We miss out on the whole love thing that goes with being close to the product.

Hey, Black Bush. You're still my favourite.
See, this is what I'm talking about. I can still remember getting dumped by my college sweetheart and getting through a bottle of this stuff. I still felt good enough about it all that when I dropped into the distillery a short time later I remembered the whiskey and not the girl. OK I'm lying. But it's a good story.
I can visit, touch and feel Bushmills. I can't get near a vineyard. We don't have any in Ireland. (well, almost none: sorry to David Llewellyn and everyone in Lusk!)

We defend Irish whiskey like it's our own. (It's actually owned by gazillions of overseas dollars. Bushmills was a recent pawn given up by Pernod Ricard to Diageo so they could go on and spend more gazillions on other peoples' memories. )

We get real nationalistic and tribal when we talk of our own. Move over Scotty we're Irish..... Yeah Irish is better than Scotch. Which it isn't but it's what makes so much of the wine trade great to work with. People still farm the product that makes the wine. Often they make the wine themselves and then get into their car and go around the world selling the stuff. Its a personal odyssey that we can join up with. It's personal, passionate and intensely nationalistic. National anthems have been written for less.

Family wine makers use things that the corporate world just doesn't like or indeed 'get'. They get to know their customers; they talk about love of the product; they relate the wine to the land, to the taste and then to themselves.

I love the recent take on Stormhoek by the good people at Orbital. Stormhoek (http://www.stormhoek.com/) is a South African wine that was succesfully marketed to bloggers. It sells through traditional channels. To a large extent it sells by recommendation. Lot's of these are from one person to another who are complete cyber strangers. At first it seems to be the antithesis of the personalised wine trade. Look closer and you find a whole lot of people cosying up to each other over shared passions. Then along comes Blue Monster.

Blue Monster is a 'biz card' cartoon written by a quixotic blog philosopher called Hugh McLeod http://www.gapingvoid.com/. He's also the marketing strategist behind Stormhoek's success in cyber world. It seems that Microsoft nerds not only love the idea of Blue Monster (adopted it as their mascot) but now relate well to a Stormhoek wine label created for them with the little blue fella on it.

Isn't this the same idea as nationalism? Flying their flag for beliefs and sharing a bottle of wine in the process. Passion and pride. It's so uncorporate! A cry from the depths. The republic of Stormhoek has opened a consulate in Microsoft.

The nasty face of nationalism is fascism. The wine trade does not like CRAV threatening to kill people and overturning vats and bombing railways in the South of France. It does like South of France wine makers defending their patch.

Bring on the Blue Monster

Bring on Stormhoek

Long Live Bushmills

The Beautiful Game

2007-09-18T15:17:00.000Z

A few years ago I was at ProWein (major Dusseldorf Wine Fair) with a buyer who actually wanted to buy wine.

He was lost and in the words of John Lennon my friends view of the wine fair was that, 'he was watching the wheels go round and round'. He was indeed 'lost in confusion.' 'Well, I tell them there's no problem only solutions. Well, they shake their heads and look at me as if I've lost my mind.....'

The problem began many years previously when this particular buyer worked as a confectionery buyer and bought tons of sticky stuff at an annual fair in Cologne. It seemed reasonable that if he took time way from the office to attend a Fair then he should actually be buying something. Seems reasonable alright. If not down right honest and sensible.

That's really not how it works though.

As bizarre as it seems most wine fairs are very expensive talking and meeting shops. You're more likely to hear, 'Let's meet up again next week and thrash this out', than ' Let's shake on it then and see you next year'.

The wine trade the world over is a very competitive market place. It can be a gruesome and tough place to work in. It is a constant source of amazement to me how the trade papers over these cracks and makes it look as though we are all having a jolly good time indeed.

Wine is a very sexy product. It appears as a voluptuous creature with an exotic history and a dollop of associated erotica. It is in effect portrayed as a very beautiful and placid product. The trade decided a long time ago that it will also portray itself in similar terms. All show with a great deal of pomp.

Then along came the modern wine fair. PR consultants; big showy stands; nights out on the town. And wine. I feel sorry for the guy who comes along with wine and no show girls. Very often he just sits and stares.

Oh sure, there are meetings, meetings and sometimes deals. But on the whole it's about keeping in touch and looking at each other. I remember one particular buyer who's stated aim at VinExpo was to garner as many quality dinner invites as he could. After all, he said, it's all about location, location, location.

Is it all just a beautiful game? Is it all just a very expensive circus where we go round and round in circles?

On Day 3 my friend brought a very large calculator into the hallowed halls of ProWein. He bought wine.

Does it still only take one to say that the emperor has no clothes?

Ah, the beautiful game goes on.

Little and Large

2007-09-04T15:32:00.000Z

I am sick to death with bile up to the back of my teeth. It seems that in some way if you run a boutique wine store you are better and holier than the giant multiple grocer who has just roared into town.

Why do people always knock the big guy and prop up the small guy?

I know some grotty small wine stores and some brilliant large ones....I have tasted crap in the bottle from boutique wineries and magic from a few industrial like combines. I have, of course, seen the whole thing the other way around also.

It may have something to do with price and nothing to do with size. Well actually it has everything to do with price. The multiple grocer in Ireland is sucking margin in to itself as it never did before. It's reckoned that as the average price for a bottle of wine dipped below 7.20Euro the margin returned to the multiple actually rose above 30% off the shelf!! ergo, they're the bad guys....ergo ergo...what they sell must be poor.....ego, ergo and some more ergo.....the other guy, and let's face it everyone else is small, must be better.

Let's hear it for the small guy who can't get his margin up any longer. Let's hear it for the poor fella who can't compete on price. Put it together. Times are tough.

This is complete stuff and absolute nonsense.

We're talking about wine here. If the price is low and the quality is acceptable then bully for the consumer: he's the winner. If the small guy can't compete on price then he must compete on something else. Get another wine; get another sales pitch; get another life...the options are legion. It has always been this way. Except of course when everyone was small. And no-one made any money then. They were all poor. Except of course for a few of the bigger of the small guys!! Noone talks about the high margins then. Ah... well, it's Ok for the small guy to make a big margin.

Wine first. Price, quality and selection. In Ireland we have every conceivable wine at every conceivable price at every conceivable quality level. It's a healthy mix for a small country.

There is no shortage of quality wine available crying out for an importer. Most of these will never arrive here. We just don't have the people. This means that per person there is an unhealthy and close association with what the big boys want to sell. We can't easily avoid it. We keep bumping into each other and into 'their' wine. It's a marketers dream. A virtual captive audience.

We have been captured. We ran out of room to run away. And we don't like it. But what's that got to do with right and wrong? Nothing really. But god, it's great to have a rant at the big guys. They can hack it.

Hack it they will. Margins rule. Get another life. Get another wine. Get another sales pitch.

Scat big guy. We're small and we're quality.

Belvedere House last weekend.

B Samples

2007-08-28T16:03:00.000Z

Ireland is well known for its world class show jumpers. Both the horses and the riders. Our very own Cian (pr. keen!) O'Connor was stripped of the Gold medal at the last Olympic Games. His horse was found to have been doped.

This month it's the turn of our brilliant Jessica Kuertin. She is brilliant. Last year she ranked Number 2 in the world. That's impressive in a sport dominated by money and class. It shows true skill.

Jessica's problem is that a banned substance was found in her mare CastleForbes Maike just after they had jointly pocketed a hundred grand for an impressive Grand Prix win.

Rather than give the money back and pay a lousy 500 Swiss Franc fine (an available option it seems) Jessica has opted to have the B sample opened and analysed.

da dum

Do B samples ever differ from their A counterparts? No idea. At least no idea when it comes to horses. But they often differ when it comes to wine!

I viewed the results of an interesting 'taste-off' recently. Forty wines had been whittled to six by an expert panel. One was chosen and received a generous five hundred case order. Wasn't I lucky'', said the delighted importer, ''that the winery could get the '06 tank sample over in time for the taste-off.''

tut tut, I thought. A tank sample at a commercial buyers tasting! tut tut. Sure, if we keep an A sample from the tank sample used at the 'taste-off' and compare it to a B sample which will arrive for sale on the shelves they will be different beasts altogether. Sorry. Wines. Not beasts. Not horses.

At this point I began delving back into an old conspiracy theory that I have harboured for years. It's a black thought and really should be kept to myself. (It should by rights be kept for drunk occasions and other excusable times.)

here goes........ Don't wine makers present wines into competition simply to win the award? Afterwards they supply something a lot less expensive and dumber to the poor fool the customer with gold medals draped around the neck of the bottle???

Do wine buyers actually keep A and B samples in their wine libraries? Do they test and taste the B Samples against the wines they contracted to buy? Do they decide to send the wine back if both are not the same?

They will if the wine is off. They will if the wine is crap. They will if the wine is dangerous.

Will they send it back if the wine is different? No they won't. Most times they won't even notice the difference. When they do they put it down to 'development'. Bottle development.

The wine trade is blessed by the fact that it works with a product which is expected to change. If it turns out that the change has actually made the product a poor drink then it can be put down to product development, bottle variation, ageing difficulties and so on. At times the wine may not be showing well at all. It may have cost a fortune at a recent auction. What do you say to that??? "It's sleeping".

Isn't it brilliant. So long as it doesn't poison people the trade can get away with just about anything. Even though it's sold as a consumable beverage it has even managed to avoid ingredient labelling.

If only Jessica's horse was a bottle of wine. Sorry judges. It developed a bit over the past few days. Sorry about the sediment in her pee. Doesn't she look great!

If only we were sure that the big wine importers insisted on B Sample tastings. It's not just about having a chemical analysis from the winery to hand in case of litigation. It's about knowing that the customer is being looked after by a trade that knows what it's doing.

After all we are being asked to swallow an awful lot these days.

Red Bull takes a Hammering

2007-08-24T09:03:00.000Z

Seems that a German consumer mag has just slated Red Bull. It says things like Red Bull contains unnecessary vitamins, questionable substances and in effect doesn't actually do what it says on the tin.

The Irish have always taken Red Bull as a given. No-one seems to have questioned whether it works. Of course it does. Man; the buzz... But what does 'works' really mean?

We know it palpitates the heart. So does jogging. We know it can fry the brain. So do scary movies. Watch a scary movie with strong instant coffee. Nothing wrong with jogging, movies or even instant....well, that's going a bit far now.....

What do the Germans mean when they say that Red Bull 'is lacking'? Its certainly not their absolutely incredible series of sponsored sporting events.

It seems that they expected the strange ingredient mix to be a semi mystical concoction that produced mystical reactions in the brain. They expected it do what it says on the tin. Give you wings. God love them but they must be a tough lot in Germany. If I down a few of these buggers I don't need wings. I levitate!

The wider debate is a good one though. If a product claims to give you 'wings'. then it needs to do just that. If a product makes a claim based on the ingredients in the can then those ingredients should be analysed before the great unwashed is allowed to indulge. Surely the point about beverages and foodstuffs is that they need to be sold based on what they are capable of doing inside your body and not whether they give you mystical wings or not. If it turns out that the wings thing doesn't actually happen then its an advertising issue and hard luck you if you believed it in the first place.

Back in 2000 Ross Cooney in Limerick died after downing four cans of Red Bull and then playing a basketball match. His heart failed. The coroner did not associate the drink as the cause. The French, Norwegians and Danes will not licence Red Bull for sale. A CBC News report quoted a French food and safety nutritionist as saying that “There are various side effects for each one of these three substances, which vary in degrees of severity. And they can also interact with each other.” i.e. what the hell is going on with the ingredients (Glucose, Caffeine, Glucuronolactone, Niacin (niacinamide), Sodium, Citrate and Inosotrol) once they enter your body?

The Canadians licenced the product with the following health warning on the can.

Not recommended for children, pregnant or breast-feeding women, caffeine sensitive persons or to be mixed with alcohol. Do not consume more than 500 ml per day.

If it stretches your heart and causes memory loss due to a pseudo hangover effect then its a food and safety issue and it should be hard luck to the manufacturer who tried to sell the product on its perceived benefits rather than its nutritional value. Boring as it sounds Red Bull seems to improve concentration and reaction times in the short term but really only gives you wings if you mix it with alcohol. So what's the mixer? The alcohol or the Red Bull ingredients?

I remember seeing Guinness ads as a kid. They went like this:

Guinness Give you Power

Guinness Gives you Strength

Back home I began drinking Guinness in earnest. Later I might add than when I was a kid. We just believed that Guinness was Good for You. I'm still drinking. I'm still waiting!

How do we Assess Wine

2007-08-16T08:55:00.000Z

Many years ago I was teaching an 'Introduction to Wine' class. As most of my instruction at the time was spontaneous I once again drifted off into something that I found particularly interesting. You know, the geek teacher thing.

I was trying to describe the shape of taste! More specifically I was attempting to show in a visual way that grapes taste different to each other. So, I suggested that we construct a multidimensional table with loads of mapping points. Then we get onto the web (at this point a few of my students asked me what the web was??) and every time someone, anywhere in the world. tasted that grape type they would be asked to enter an x against the strength or intensity of each of the variables in the table. The idea was we would end up with millions of objective inputs thus smoothing out bias in the tasting process.

Then I proceeded to draw the 'hypothetical' results! I showed that Chardonnay would most likely be bulbous in four dimensions while Riesling would stretch out into a long thin line. It would be a bit like Surf Rider meets The Thing. One slim and sleek; the other fat and globulous.

Yesterday I came across a line in The Best of Wine in Ireland 2007. It's a good book. If you live in Ireland its quite useful. Page 203 titled, 'How the wines were assessed' concludes, "After separate tasting the two tasters compared their scores and comments. Remarkably, demonstrating the objectiveness of this process, in about 85 percent of cases the two tasters spontaneously agreed their marks to within 1 point out of 20. If they could not agree the editor was asked to adjudicate."

It was a blind tasting and the tasters were academically well qualified. But, what if it was blind and the tasters weren't qualified at all? Would that negate a result to within one point of each other if say the question being asked was something like, " Is this wine?" Clearly the editor would have been a busy bee that day!

These examples are extreme. They would be the basis for bad law. I do contend however that they give credence to my belief that as the wine trade itself has decided that its tastings are objective then it is an inherently biased trade. There is a small cohort of 'expert' tasters determining the shape of the grape in the glass. It is a self fulfilling prophecy that if the experts say Chardonnay should be thin and score it accordingly then it will indeed be made thin. It is equally prophetic of me to say that if I take two tasters from the same academic background with similar time on their hands, with similar trade backgrounds they will think and taste like each other in at least 85% of cases! Who is brave enough to say that both Parker and Robinson are correct.

Maybe the great unwashed has been saying this to us over the years and we have been muddling along gracefully in blissful
ignorance of the fact that the sheep are the successful ones. Indeed Vitis Vinifera accordingly is more successful than the saps who make it into wine in the first place! Perhaps our bias is being prejudiced by Vinifera herself! Has anyone ever given it some real thought as to why some of her progeny have been abandoned to history forever while try as we might to extinguish others they seem to cling on regardless?

Think about it! Who actually decided that Sauvignon Blanc would take over from Chardonnay?

It wasn't the wine trade. Was it the consumer? God forbid....well, I'd believe that before giving the trade an award. If we know the answer then fancy pants what's coming next?? What's coming down the tracks Mr Wine Expert?

Are we tasting to some predefined bias and if so are we setting the bias or is it the consumer or......... is it Vinifera? Are we the sheep after all? Does it matter what we think so long as we give in and seem to set the rules as to how to enjoy ourselves?

One thing I am certain about. No matter what Vinifera does to us she can't change the shape of her offspring. Another thing I am certain of is that if we get enough people saying the same thing it won't matter what she thinks she can do to us. Take that Vinifera! We need everyone to be an expert or all the experts to be everyone.

And another thing that I am absolutely certain of: Chardonnay is a Thing!

Wine Labels...and Canada

2007-08-08T10:22:00.000Z

There's a wine 'debate' doing the rounds right now in relation to labelling. For once it's not about ingredients but more to do with when is wine white and when is a grape not white. I speak of White Zinfandel, often referred to as White Zin which as everyone really knows (?) is not white at all but pink.

It has been decided that from next year on the term will be illegal in the EU. The Brits seem to have jumped the gun and technically brought the ban into force straight away and the Californians who are ultimatley responsible don't seem to have been told!!

It's really all a bit of a giggle given that most of these wines are so sweet and poorly made that my problem with them is that they are called wine in the first place.

Most label difficulties between North America and Europe have arisen because them over there have so little history attached to their wines that they coasted for a long time stealing all the place names they could pronounce from Europe. It's still common to find Californian Chablis and even 'Burgundy' made in Texas!! They are not allowed to export these labels to the EU and to be fair they are attempting to ditch them. After all Europe would appear to prefer to drink to varietal labels anyway and very often a California AVA wine will outshine many French AC's. (that's American Viticultural Area v Appellation Controlee; get with the script people)

Sometimes I find the whole thing ridiculous. Take the Canadians. They have succesfully developed a wine program that makes very good wines. The best of these is entitled to apply for the VQA symbol (Vintners Quality Alliance). One of the unique success stories has been their promotion of the Ice Wine category. You like sweet? You like quality? You adore Canadian Ice Wine. Protected name in Canada? Well you would think so given that they fought tooth and nail to have the labels accepted by the EU in the first place.

When the EU allowed them in there was cause for some sups in the barrel rooms that night.

But if you go into any LCB (Liqour Control Board) store in Canada - the Canadians are still treated as children by their provinces -you will find a bottle labelled 'Ice Wine with Brandy' on sale. Bloody Hell. I kid you not. Here's the photo.......

Ok it's a small bottle and a very small label. Small difficulty. Well........ they do call it wine. So, what's the problem? Don't the Portuguese make Port this way? No. Don't the Sherry producers add alcohol. Yeah but a whole lot more goes into sherry. Vin du Natural? Nah, they finished this wine and then topped it up! Why would anyone brave sub zero temperatures to pick frozen grapes that have hardly any juice in them just to muck the finished product up by adding brandy? Well, to make sweet wine with bite is one answer. The real answer here is that finally the Canadians have some success and at least a little history. They then immedietaly abuse, debase and copy their own name!! Just the same as if it was a Chablis or even a 'Sherry'.

Well now, have a look at this. It's not bad. Drinks well. It's Canadian Chardonnay Sherry. Now we're getting places. Not only have the Canadians managed to develop a wine program but somehow they also managed to adapt Vitis Vinifera clones to their harsh and long winter climate. That was no mean feat. Congratulations all round. Last year I tasted some Clos Jordanne (Boisset) Pinot Noir from the barrel and have to admit that it was exceptional wine.

Imagine. On the verge of showing the world that you have a Vinifera based wine industry capable of impressing the Bourgogne. The Holy Grail.

Oh, and we make Chardonnay Sherry as well. You should try some.........

Here's the happy couple

White Zin? No problem. Blue Nun Pink. It's out there.......

Uncle Richard's Grapes revisited

2007-07-13T09:27:00.000Z

I have always been fond of saying that where civilisation went so did the vine. I often mention the Greeks and Romans. I round off with European 'civilisation' colonising the New World. Sure didn't Van Riebeeck bring himself and the vine to South Africa both at the same time!

Kinky Friedman has a title called Elvis, Jesus & Coca Cola. It's a reference to the fact that these are the three most recognised brands on the globe. Nice to believe that Jesus can lay claim to being a celeb wine maker (the Cana gig) as well as to bringing the whole wine thing into mainstream religous culture. On the other hand things do seem to have changed since the Romans....

This brings me in an untidy fashion around to a modern day vine pilgrim. A possible harbinger of an ancient civilisation; a religous believer in the inherant value of the vine as a symbol of self and place within the Elvis, Jesus and CocaCola world! I refer to Uncle Richard.

Regular Readers, God bless 'em all, will remember a column I wrote in '04 about Uncle Richard's grapes. I bared my innermost uncivil thoughts in that column. I expressed envy and jealousy towards the quality of Uncle Richard's Black Muscat grown oustside in the southern suburbs of Dublin. Ireland; as John Prine would say.

Oh Boy, did they look good.

Uncle Richard had a natural heat sink at the back end of his patio. It made the back wall of my garden in Celbridge seem like a scene from a frozen gulag. I was fond of my terroir but try as I might I just could not ripen my grapes as well as Uncle Richard could.

By harvest time Uncle Richard invariably had grapes galore to make a few bottles of vintage Blackrock. I made jam.

See what I mean! That collander is my total 2005 harvest.

Last week Uncle Richard upped sticks and moved house. As with explorers of old he left his home vineyard behind. Along with his prized possessions he carefully packed a rooted new vine. When I saw it last week it was growing well. It had been lovingly tucked into a pint glass filled to a quarter with brown slimy water. This baby was cut from the mother vine a few short weeks ago. It will now be transported to a new terroir. My chance has arrived.

Sure didn't it take the Romans hundreds of years to re-establish their vines into the South of France. Some would say that without religous intervention Uncle Richard may have a few problems getting his grapes up again for quite a while. And the last I heard his new place looked nothing like a closed monastery.......

The shame is it hasn't stopped raining for the last forty days and forty nights. Yesterday was St Swithans and it poured out of the heavens all evening long. All good vineyard managers will know that in forty days time I should be looking at well formed grapes! The agony. They are just tiny marbles as we speak.

I may not have a harvest at all this year. But then Uncle Richard won't have another decent return for at least three years. May be its time to bring in a consultant. That'll show him. I'll get a few RP points down while he's not looking and before anyone guesses I'll change consultants. I'll blame the changing house style on soil development, biodynamicism, a warming planet, a wettening planet, micro oxygenation.

Mondevino, I love you to pips.

Uncle Richard, my vintage has arrived.

Wine Labels Tell All.

2007-07-04T11:13:00.000Z

I came across this today. I used to write a weekly column for the Cork Evening Echo....in Cork....Ireland....

Read this and then think of the fabulous Fat Bastard and not so fabulous Dogs Bollox labels! Sometimes I get it wrong!

Cork: 2005

I was handed a bottle of the Chilean Cousiño Macul Sauvignon Gris last week. Before I go any further I really need to explain that I am a grape fanatic. Sometimes complete strangers give me wines because they've been told I'm looking for obscure grape types. Feteasca, Negra Amoro, Torrontes, and the like have all found their way onto my palate. I have followed the progress of Sagrantino’s in Italy to Tannats from Uruguay. Then the Sauvignon Gris arrived.

Chile is, as Miguel Torres has put it, ‘a viticultural paradise’. To a large extent the vineyards in Chile are capable of growing every grape type in the world. There is an enormous range of climates and soils types and there is a virtual absence of vineyard disease. When the older vineyards were established they used cuttings from some of the finest French vineyards. The vineyards of Europe were subsequently destroyed at the end of the nineteenth century by a pest called Phylloxera. The solution to the Phylloxera problem was to graft all new vines onto resistant rootstocks of North American origin. The vineyard of Chile is the only large vineyard area of the world that has not been affected by Phylloxera.

Chile is bounded by the Andes, the Atacama desert, the Pacific Ocean and the sub Antatrctic. In addition a lot of the soil in the central valleys are immature and sandy in their nature. As it happens these are all of the conditions that phylloxera does not like. The vineyards of Chile still sport direct descendent vines from the cuttings that were used to plant them in the first place. They are not grafted, tend to be long lived and good producers.

In some cases however the original vines were incorrectly classified in the vineyards. Recently it has been established that many Chilean Merlot vines are in fact Carmenere. Strange as it seems these two vines don’t look alike in the field and produce quite different wines in the glass. While I prefer Merlot the rest of the world seems to be taking a shine to Chilean Carmenere.

Carmenere can be a haunting style of wine with lots of rich and juicy bramble textures to the fruit. There are quite a few available. Santa Rita has one of the more memorable examples.

The same thing happened to Chilean Sauvignon Blanc. Some of it was in fact another grape called Sauvignon Gris all along. The style here is a lot more akin to a Semillon with lanolin and nutty elements rather than grassy herbaceous Sauvignon Blanc notes. Cousino Macul is one of the few companies exporting a Gris. They also do a fabulous Riesling under the Dona Isadora label. Together with their flagship Antiguas Reservas Cabernet Sauvignon these labels all tell a remarkable story of triumph over the years. Triumph against disease and ignorance, climate and commerce. The story behind the grape can often be as fascinating as the story behind the winery or indeed the region of origin.

It's stories like these that make the world of wine such a fascinating place. Each one of these grapes is affected by a multitude of factors all the way to how we pour the result into our glass. Then it all changes again with the next vintage….No wonder I follow the grapes. They have personality. They have the rhythm.

As a complete aside this was a fab cover..

Cabanon Revisited

2007-05-15T16:49:00.000Z

I was bouncing through Gavi recently when the thought occurred that I was close to my old pals at Fattoria Cabanon in Godiasco, Lombardy. Well, an hour and a half away.

So I turned the rental around and zoom. They drive real fast in Italy!

I arrived early on a Sunday morning. Elena Mercandelli was already out in the winery. She never tires of working out how to make brilliant wine.

Let's go back a bit and introduce the estate. Fattoria Cabanon is an organic wine farm in Lombardy in the North West of Italy. Some of the property rolls over into neighbouring Piedmont. Elena runs the business with her husband Giovanni and they have a young son called Gregorio.

Elena is the wine maker. At one time she had the distinction of being one of the few female wine makers in Italy. She was certainly the youngest. Her father handed over the reins to the vat when Elena was sixteen years old!

The family has always farmed the land organically. Here is a family that doesn't have to learn how to be good to the world. They already know how!

There is a spiritual aspect to Elena's approach to everything. She seems to have herself happy with her karma. Sincerity and tremendous joy shines through in the wine. They have personality. They hug you close and don't want you to leave.

I was very pleased to see the land in such amazing condition. It looked healthy and freshened up after the spring. Elena works hard at keeping tradition alive. The land comes first; vines come next and then the grapes follow. Each one is given her absolute attention to detail. She has just planted a full hectare of ancient and rare vines only found in one or two places across the north of Italy. She is a guardian.

Back in the kitchen the Mercandelli's treated me to a Sunday morning tasting. Pinot Grigio 06 is spectacular. Another great vintage. I'm not a great fan of their Sauvignon Blanc simply because it's a meaty style and I've been spoiled with light aromatics for so long now it's hard to see past the apricots. They call it Cabanon Blanc.

Riesling 06 is another kettle of fish though. It's light, zingy and I'll tell you. Come back to this in five years. Here's a wine that'll grow and grow.

I was running low on time and still had to negotiate the runaway twisty road back to Genoa for a midday flight! Then they started pouring reds. Good thing I don't drink on the job.. Good thing one these is called , la Botte no. 18 Coure di Vino i.e. it's good for your heart!

I adore the Barbera they label as Prunello. It's fleshy, meaty, soft, spicy, long flavours just do it for me again and again.

Giovanni dragged me out at this stage to look at the boars. We couldn't find them. Just as well. The last time I saw them there was one more. We went back inside and had some home made salami.

Visit their website at http://www.cabanon.it/ It shows that this may be boutique and organic but the range of wines that Elena makes is really interesting. She makes old and often forgotten styles and marries these into her portfolio with modern fruit and barrique driven styles, sparkling to sweet.

This is what it should be about - all of the time.